I've been trying to do a post for eight months now... and no matter how hard I try, I'm never satisfied that it communicates what I want... either I'm way too pessimistic and gloomy... or, I'm giving off an air that I'm on top of the world! Actually, both can be true... or neither... meaning, that in the course of a normal day... its so hard to be normal!
OK, let's start with the gloom first...
I crash (meaning I'm "off") every three hours... my body and brain freezes for up to 2 hours. My speech can be affected anytime... stress brings it on at the most inopportune times... like when I answer the phone. Most often, I speak only the first few words clearly... but from then on, it's anyone's guess! So if you call, and I answer, and the next thing you know Dorrie is talking to you... well, I freaked out and handed the phone to her!
I find multitasking very difficult... I'm talking simple tasks... I can be so easy distracted, and at times disorientated... Daily, I find myself mumbling,"I remember being better at this..." So frustrating...
But then, somewhere, deep down inside my being... from the core of who I am in Christ... there comes this sense of just how richly blessed I am... no matter how difficult or enduring the trial...
"What a God we have! And how fortunate we are to have him, this Father of our Master Jesus! Because Jesus was raised from the dead, we’ve been given a brand-new life and have everything to live for, including a future in heaven—and the future starts now! God is keeping careful watch over us and the future.
The Day is coming when you’ll have it all—life healed and whole. I know how great this makes you feel, even though you have to put up with every kind of aggravation in the meantime. Pure gold put in the fire comes out of it proved pure; genuine faith put through this suffering comes out proved genuine.
When Jesus wraps this all up, it’s your faith, not your gold, that God will have on display as evidence of his victory.You never saw him, yet you love him. You still don’t see him, yet you trust him—with laughter and singing. Because you kept on believing, you’ll get what you’re looking forward to: total salvation." ~ 1 Peter 1:3-9 ~ The Message
Music by Keith Getty; Words by Margaret Becker
Copyright © 2002 Thankyou Music
Jesus draw me ever nearer
As I labor through the storm.
You have called me to this passage,
and I'll follow, though I'm worn.
May this journey bring a blessing,
May I rise on wings of faith;
And at the end of my heart's testing,
With Your likeness let me wake.
Jesus guide me through the tempest;
Keep my spirit staid and sure.
When the midnight meets the morning,
Let me love You even more.
Let the treasures of the trial
Form within me as I go -
And at the end of this long passage,
Let me leave them at Your throne.
Beautiful. Thank you Merv for your continuous encouragement to my soul. You have been a great friend during my times of trial and now you prove again your great friendship in your time of trial and groaning. I love you Merv, Chris
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing, dad. We treasure the time we get with you, even though it's interrupted frequently by "parks". Keep on sharing your struggle -- it's such an encouragement to me! When I think my life is hard, I can pray for strength to be as strong and brave as my dad.
ReplyDeleteMerv you continue to shine as you press on and trust him through the suffering and even confusion. I am so thankful for you, your kindness and friendship. Praying for great grace and sight that can continue to see that it is "in all these things (tribulation, distress, persecution, famine, nakedness, danger, sword, etc.) in all these things that we are more than conquerors through him who loved us" (Rom.8:35-37). Merv thank you for posting. It is a gift to all of us. Peace and grace to you in Jesus' name.
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